Short Skirts and Comfort

[AMM]

... I'm not saying that we cannot construct looks that are uniquely "us", I'm saying that we cannot cross the bounds of taste -- universally understood taste, at that -- by making spectacles of ourselves. Exhibitionism doesn't have a place in this millieu; this is serious business. If I'm going to be perceived as an exhibitionistic freak every time I'm see in public in a skirt I'll give it up; it's not worth the damage that it might do to my reputation.

That's more or less where I am.

When I go contra dancing in a skirt, I want people to say, "look at that cool skirt," not, "oh no, not him!" I want people to be glad I'm there, to feel that I'm adding to their fun, not to edge away from me and make excuses not to dance with me.

And if I run into a neighbor at my apartment building, or at the grocery store, I'd like them to feel that I'm a "regular guy" who they can talk to, maybe with a harmless eccentricity, but not so bad. (Not like being a Red Sox fan .)

This requires that I gauge the context and consider how I come across. I have to care about what other people think of what I'm wearing. This is a lot harder than either slavishly following the crowd or dressing like you don't give a d--n about anyone else.

And, as crfriend says, I need to be even more careful about my appearance than the average person. Guys show up at our contra dances in T-shirts and cut-offs, with their "spare tire" hanging out over their waistbands, and it's OK. Well, I went to a contra dance Saturday in a T-shirt, but I don't think I'd do it again -- if I'm going to wear something that exposes my obesity, better to blend into the crowd.

-- AMM

[ChristopherJ]

The traditional feminine way of crossing the legs involves having one thigh on top of the other and the calves parallel. An alternative involves just crossing the calves but keeping them as parallel as possible. Both are designed to keep the knees together, so they're really just variants of "keep your knees together."

The traditional male version of crossing the legs involves putting one ankle on top of the other knee. If you try this, you'll see that the calves are perpendicular to one another and your legs are somewhat spread. This does not hide anything.

Thank you AMM - I didn't understand what you meant before - but I do now. I've always sat crosslegged with one thigh on top of the other - and find that OK when I am wearing a short skirt. I have only rarely adopted the "traditional male version" as you call it - it's OK if I was in a very low seat or something like that - but ONLY in trousers.
Anyhow - thanks for clarifying things for me - you even had me crossing and uncrossing my legs to work out how I did it!

Regarding the topic of photos that have been posted here - I agree with the idea of some sort of policy in this respect and am pleased that there is now a thread on this in the "Changes at the cafe" folder.

I don't understand why the Satirist flounced off. What was that all about? So a few dubious photos were posted - so what? Is the forum not robust enough to deal with that and move on? I sincerely hope it is. To begin ranting about transvestites, perverts and exhibitionists etc. is a bit over the top in my opinion . . .

[Sasquatch]

I'd like them to feel that I'm a "regular guy" who they can talk to, maybe with a harmless eccentricity, but not so bad. (Not like being a Red Sox fan .)

HEY!! I resemble that remark!
Sasq

[Sarongman]

My opinion, and I stress it is only mine, is that any skirt knee kength or less is too much of a hassle in public and therefore a dead loss. For a man to be at ease in public it should be a traditional kilt where the pleats drop in or an ankle length. Case in point was a man with his girl friend we (SO and I) saw at a McShit cafe a few years ago. He was wearing a short sarong and, with his legs spread. It was my SO who, only just managing not to laugh, pointed out that he was OBVIOUSLY going regimental.

[ChristopherJ]

My opinion, and I stress it is only mine, is that any skirt knee kength or less is too much of a hassle in public and therefore a dead loss. For a man to be at ease in public it should be a traditional kilt where the pleats drop in or an ankle length.

Excuse me - but you started off your post by stressing that it is your opinion only - and then you made a sweeping statement that "For a man to be at ease in public it should be a traditional kilt . . . ". I think it would have been preferable if you had said something like "For me to be at ease in public . . etc. " - as that keeps it personal.

After all, this is supposed to be your own opinion - and it is not a FACT that for a man to be at ease in public it (the skirt) should be a traditional kilt. I wear short skirts - and I am completely at ease in public. And I've had three different guys on three different occasions this week tell me that I look good in a skirt.

So nya!

[binx]

I agree. I'm at ease in my Lane Bryant knee lengths, 16" denim Old Navy, or a UK. The guy in the mini-sarong was just careless...a mini is way more comfy than a pair of shorts. Just wear responsibly and NOT regimental. There are way too many camera-phones out there! Web sites are dedicated to showing that kilts are just as risky going regimental as a mini-skirt.

binx

[Sarongman]

Okay! point well taken, (whimper, cringe) I should have been more cautious in my choice of wording.

[ChristopherJ]

You're forgiven. Just don't do it again. Whatever you did . . .

<swaggers around thread in short miniskirt looking for someone else to duff up . . . >